1st Story:
By ?
Appearances:
Oswald, Li'l Professor, Rudy the Robot, party attendees, mounted heads of a bear and moo-dear, Dopey Dan, train passengers, bear
Synopsis:
Oswald, the Professor's nephew, bets him everything in his piggy bank that he can't actually hunt and kill a bear in the woods. The Professor accepts the bet and brings Owald and Rudy, the Professor's robot, along. As they travel by train to the Maine woods, Dopey Dan escapes from the clink and hides in a cabin in the woods. As fate would have it, that cabin is the Professor's destination. Dopey Dan doesn't have any dry clothes of his own, so he wears an old bear skin he finds in the cabin. The next day the Professor arrives at the cabin. Oswald thinks he can trick the Professor by dressing Rudy in a bear costume, but the Professor sees what he is doing. When he goes out hunting, he comes across a bear and falsely believes that it is Rudy. He gets scared and flees when he realizes it's a real bear. He runs into the cabin and bumps into Dopey Dan, who he mistakes as Rudy again. Dan pulls a gun, so the professor opens the cabin door and runs outside. Dan chases him and crashes into the real bear, knocking himself and the bear out. Oswald then mistakes the bear for Rudy and tries to drag it inside. The bear awakens and attacks Oswald, but Rudy picks up a rifle and shoots the bear. Oswald reluctantly agrees that the Professor won the bet, since they bagged a bear and Dopey Dan, for whom a reward had been announced. The joke's on the professor, though, since there was only a nickel in Oswald's piggy bank.
Note:
As far as I can tell, the Professor is never given a name.
2nd Story:
By Basil Wolverton
Appearances:
Splash Morgan, people waiting in line for the bathroom, cook, diner patrons, pedestrians, driver, Splash's boss, construction worker, martians, martian animal, Glurp, Gloop, Professor Pickens
Synopsis:
Splash Morgan wakes up and wants to take a shower, but there's a huge line of people waiting to use the bathroom. Realizing he'll be late for work if he waits, he skips the shower and goes to a diner for breakfast. However, another patron he nicknames Professor Pickens is picking his teeth with a toothpick and this makes Morgan lose his appetite. Instead, he goes to work, but he's two seconds late. His boss fires him for this, and Morgan loses it, ranting that he's had it with work and wants to move to another planet, although he doesn't know how to do that. Walking down the street, he comes across a building that's about to be demolished with dynamite. It's too late for him to get away from the blast, so he jumps in a garbage can, hoping it will protect him. The blast is so powerful that he is thrown all the way to Mars. There he encounters two Martians, Glurp and Gloop, who are local dictators (and clearly modeled after Hitler and Stalin) that try to pick Morgan's pockets. Morgan tries to fight them off, but he's outnumbered. Then he sees that Professor Pickens was also blasted to Mars and asks for help. Pickens pokes both dictators with a toothpick and announces that he wants to take over. Morgan, however, has had enough of Mars and wants to go home. He buys a stick of dynamite from a Martian proprietor and shoves both Pickens and himself inside another garbage can, intending to blow them back to Earth.
Note:
This story, while weird, seems to me to be compatible with 616 continuity. The "Martians" Morgan meets are never said to be natives, so they could be visiting aliens, like many other "Martians" we see in stories published in the 40s and 50s.
3rd Story:
By ?
Appearances:
Bill Gale, Patty Gale, Mayor Powers, Crunch, Comedy Kids (Junior Gale, Gabby, Muscles), Mr. Riley (cop), zoo-goers, giraffe, gorilla, elephant, spider, thugs working for Powers
Synopsis:
Bill Gale is running for mayor against the current Mayor Powers, who is corrupt. Powers wants to stop Gale, so he has his toady, Crunch, pack a bomb inside a cake and have it delivered to Gale. Gale's security won't let Crunch inside Gale's house, so Crunch dresses up as an old crone and asks the Comedy Kids (Gale's son Junior and his friends Gabby and Muscles) to deliver it as a sign of "her" support. The kids agree to do it, but a storm kicks up, so the kids take shelter in an old house rumored to be haunted. It happens to be the headquarters of Crunch and thugs working for him. They try to capture the kids, but Muscles fights back until the thugs accidentally open the cake box, setting off the bomb. With the scheme exposed, Powers is arrested and Gale wins the election.
Note:
A story very much in the same vein as the Tough Kid Squad.
4th Story:
By ?
Appearances:
Captain Dash, Marmon, Marmon's pilots, American pilots, American infantry, American senator, American citizens, scientists, horse
Synopsis:
In the 31st century, Captain Dash is a heroic pilot for America. One day, Marmon, ruler of the Pacific Isles, attacks America. His fleet sprays a fear gas that affects most Americans. Dash is immune, however, so scientists are able to develop a counteragent to the fear gas using his blood. After treating enough American pilots, they counterattack and defeat Marmon's fleet. Dash himself captures Marmon, and the invasion is over.
Note:
According to marvunapp, this story takes place on Earth-1241.
5th Story:
By ?
This Silver Scorpion story is already in the MCP.
6th Story:
By ?
This Citizen V story is already in the MCP.
Text Story:
By Andrew McWhiney
Appearances:
Tim Hogan, Conover, construction workers, San Francisco office speaker, Dynamite Denny Killian, snipers
Synopsis:
Tim Hogan is the boss on a construction project high up in the mountains. One day Conover shows up and threatens Hogan, pressuring him into hiring Conover's thugs. Hogan refuses, but over the next several days his men are attacked and parts of the project are sabotaged. Dynamite Denny Killian, who works for Hogan, has run into Conover before and predicts that Conover is about to send trucks filled with thugs to the site to attack the project and shut it down. Hogan has Dynamite booby trap the road and, once the explosives are set off and trap the trucks, the rest of Hogan's crew rush out of the bushes and beat the h--- out of Conover's thugs. Rounding them all up, the thugs are put back in the trucks and Hogan has them all delivered to the sheriff.
7th Story:
By ?
Appearances:
Tubby, Tack, potential customers, kids
Synopsis:
Tubby and Tack have a stack of magazines they are trying to sell door to door. They aren't having much luck until they decide on a new strategy: both go to the same house at the same time but at different doors, thereby selling to both the man and woman of the house.
8th Story:
By Clive Yeadon
Appearances:
Trinket, her mom, her cat, Doctor Drypotch, Stubby
Synopsis:
Trinket's mom is having Doctor Drypotch over for dinner. Before and throughout dinner, Trinket can't help but embarrass her mom, such as by pointing out a hair in her food. Once the doctor leaves, Trinket is sure she is about to be spanked for her behavior.
Note:
Wow, I didn't know that Trinket was a recurring character. I also found out that she appeared in Human Torch Comics #10, which was analyzed here a while ago, but no chronology was created for her, so I included that appearance below, too.
9th Story:
By Bill Everett
This Fin story is already in MCP.
Chronologies:
CRUNCH
COMEDYC2 9/3
DOPEY DAN
COMEDYC2 9
DRYPOTCH, DR.
COMEDYC2 9/8
GABBY
COMEDYC2 9/3
GALE, BILL
COMEDYC2 9/3
GALE, JUNIOR
COMEDYC2 9/3
GALE, PATTY
COMEDYC2 9/3
GLOOP
COMEDYC2 9/2
GLURP
COMEDYC2 9/2
HOGAN, TIM
COMEDYC2 9/TEXT
HURLEY, DAN
DARMC 7/5
DARMC 8/5
*COMEDYC2 9/5 (add)
KILLIAN, "DYNAMITE" DENNY
COMEDYC2 9/TEXT
LI'L PROFESSOR
COMEDYC2 9
MR. BLACK/DR. BORGOR
COMEDYC2 9/5
MUSCLES
COMEDYC2 9/3
POWERS, MAYOR
COMEDYC2 9/3
PROFESSOR PICKENS
COMEDYC2 9/2
RUDY THE ROBOT
COMEDYC2 9
SILVER SCORPION/ELISABETH BARSTOW
DARMC 7/5
DARMC 8/5
*COMEDYC 9 (delete)
*COMEDYC2 9/5 (add)
INV2 2
INV2 3
SPLASH MORGAN
COMEDYC2 9/2
TACK
COMEDYC2 9/7
TRINKET
JOCO 1/3
COMEDYC2 9/8
HTC 10/2
TUBBY
COMEDYC2 9/7
EARTH-1241
CAPTAIN DASH
COMEDYC2 9/4
MARMON
COMEDYC2 9/4